Handsome Squidward Meme Generator
The flat in the listing photos: bright, spacious, "close to amenities". The flat in real life: a wardrobe with a window, close to a kebab shop's extractor fan.
The burger on the menu board is three inches tall, glistening and heroic. The burger in the box has been sat on.
You at 9 in the morning, outfit planned, hair done, ready to conquer the day. You at 6 in the evening, seen sideways in the window of a bus.
Your plan for the weekend: a long run, the farmers' market, a novel by the window. The weekend: a crisp sandwich at 3 in the afternoon, still in pyjamas.
Why it caught on: in "The Two Faces of Squidward" (season 4) a door to the face leaves Squidward briefly, impossibly handsome, before he ends up his old self again. Side by side, the two faces became every promise next to what actually turned up.
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